Why are we scared to discuss money?
My family taught me not to talk about money with people outside of the family. Money, and how much you had or earned at work, was supposed to be a guarded secret. I am unsure if it is an American thing or if it is like that everywhere. My friends and colleagues who are more upper crust say it is gauche to speak of money and one’s wealth. Any bragging is unhealthy though and makes you wonder what the braggart is compensating for with their words and actions. However, knowledge is power.
Many employee manuals instruct their workers not to discuss salary with others in the office. Well think about how that is an advantage to the business owner? If Adam makes $70,000 and Bill makes $45,000 for doing the same work, then the company is saving itself $25,000 on Bill’s salary. Employers are allowed to pay at different rates based on a worker’s expertise, experience, and years of service, but if Adam and Bill have similar backgrounds, you may wonder what Bill did wrong. Maybe Bill is a poor negotiator. Maybe Bill only made $40,000 at his last job and so the extra $5,000 sounded amazing. He won and the company won. If Bill finds out Adam is making more money for the same work, Bill may end up being less productive or leave the company for a better paying job.
Women in the United States have it even worse. Many women are often told from the moment they can speak as toddlers that we need to be quiet, agreeable, and non-confrontational. This training to be quiet and agreeable females continues throughout our youth. Cultures in other parts of the world often encourage women to be subordinate. Women may become quiet and agreeable during the hiring process too; and, therefore, women may not negotiate the wages and benefits we deserve.
Whatever your history and background with money, today you can make a commitment to yourself that you will not settle anymore. Ask for a fair wage. Demand that customers pay what you are worth. Can you run specials? Yes, businesses run specials and offer deals all the time. However, there should be times when you are also charging full price for your services. You deserve to be paid for your time. You are as worthy as anybody else to be paid for the work you do. Now, a confession, in the past I did not do this. I used to give what is called the “friends and family discount.” I do not do that anymore. I charge the going hourly rate that is typical in my profession no matter who is asking. I realized one day that I was shortchanging my friends and myself. If I hire Wendy to do my taxes, I am going to pay her. Why would I not have her pay me? Now do I pass along savings to my customers? Yes, all my customers benefit from the fact that I keep my overhead low.
My hope is that you walk away from this blog today and really question your relationship with money and wealth. Do you think you only deserve to make a certain amount? Are you in survival mode thinking, “If I can make $500 per week, me and my kids will be okay”? Think bigger! Start talking to friends and associates about money and fees. Do research. Practice negotiating with a friend. There is much to gain and little to lose if you have a take-charge approach to your money.
